No longer missing

Despite evidence to the contrary, I am still on the planet.  With everything that has been occurring over the past few months (prepping and staging a house to sell, open houses and showings, selling a house, packing and moving across country, and settling into a new location; plus deadlines at work), I have not made myself write anything.  Some days I was too exhausted.  Other days, just didn’t know what to say.  Many thoughts bounced around in my head, but nothing crystal clear.

This cross-country move has brought me back home (quite literally, moving in with Mom to help her out a bit).  Over the past 11+ years, I have grown a great deal.  Many experiences gave many opportunities for learning.  This was brought home to me in an interesting way.

I was visiting a friend a few days ago, and noticed some photos she had posted on her refrigerator.  I recognized her and two other friends in the photo, but couldn’t quite figure out the fourth person.  I knew she looked familiar.  After staring at the photo for a moment, I started to recognize myself.  It was really weird that I didn’t instantly realize it was a picture of me.  The picture was 10 years old.  Yes, my hairstyle had changed a bit, but nothing drastic.  It was something about the face.  There was a slight emptiness or hollowness about it.  There was a smile at my mouth, but not so much in my eyes.

Since that photo was taken, I have gone through some counseling and recovered from depression.  There is now more light in my eyes.  (Not to sound conceited, but I believe I look better now – ten years later – than I did then.)  I am so thankful for making the effort to get better.  I now have more confidence and purpose in my life.